ha ha ha
Lou Heavy
   *new*
25.08.2009 17:19:29    ( 30167 )
Dva zajíci hulí u řeky trávu a válí se smíchy. Pak usnou.
Vyleze krokodýl a jednoho polkne, z tlamy mu koukají jen uši.
Druhý se probere, kouká a říká: "Pičo jsem nevěděl, že máš spacák od Lacoste!"
panda
   *new*
03.08.2009 20:54:55    ( 29664 )
A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food."
The panda yells back, "Hey, man, I'm a panda. Look it up!"
The bartender opens his dictionary to panda: "A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."
mjk
   *new*
13.07.2009 10:05:37    ( 29238 )
2gpg: ne e, to rikala jedna japonka v efilmu TOKIO!...:))...jinak v Liverpoolu bylo uzasne:))
gappak
   *new*
07.07.2009 14:58:04    ( 29158 )
2MJK: Slysel jsi v Literpoolu? Oz chapu vyznam Anglicky Humor....
mjk
   *new*
07.07.2009 12:43:29    ( 29154 )
Tak to byli jednou dva jedovati hadi a ten jeden se pta druheho "hele, jsme my dva hadi jedovati?" a ten druhy odpovi "no samozrejme, ze jsme jedovati hadi" a ten prvni rika "doprcic, tak to je dost spatny, protoze jsem se prave pred chvilkou kousl do jazyka.."
deus
   *new*
30.06.2009 08:49:30    ( 29022 )
Jeden obrazkovy.
deus
   *new*
23.06.2009 15:16:42    ( 28885 )
Pošťačka zvoní u dveří. Otevře jí malý, snad sedmiletý chlapec s pivem v ruce a zapáleným doutníkem v puse. Otřesená pošťačka se ptá: "Ehmm... Ahoj, jsou rodiče doma?" Chlapec potáhne z doutníku, kouř vyfoukne směrem k pošťačce, odklepe popel na koberec a znuděně prohodí: "Co myslíš?"
deus
   *new*
23.06.2009 15:06:17    ( 28884 )
Aky je rozdiel medzi frajerom a superfrajerom?
Frajer si da vyfajcit a potom sa pyta:"No co moja, aky som bol?"
Superfrajer si da vyfajcit a ked sa mu nepostavi, povie:"Pocuvaj cica, to sa ti stava casto?"
deus
   *new*
18.06.2009 15:26:17    ( 28790 )
MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital.
Please select from the following options menu:
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the MotherShip.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.
If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators are too busy to talk with you.
If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.
If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up...

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